I Forgive Me: Letting Go of Regret and Learning to Breathe Again

We all have regrets.

We’ve all hurt people—sometimes without meaning to, sometimes because we didn’t know how to do better. We’ve all said things we shouldn’t have, done things we wish we could take back, acted from fear, anger, insecurity, or pain.

And for a long time, I carried the weight of it.

I used to replay those moments over and over in my mind—trying to rewrite the past in my head, trying to figure out how I could have been better, how I could have avoided hurting others… or myself. But no matter how many times I went back, nothing changed.

Because the past is out of my control.
I can’t undo what I’ve done.

What I can do is learn.
What I can do is choose to be better—today and tomorrow.

I can sit with my mistakes, not to punish myself, but to remember.
To never repeat them.
To carry the lessons forward like sacred reminders.

I’ve realized that growing up doesn’t mean being perfect—it means owning what you’ve done, and still choosing to grow.
Regret is normal.
Guilt is human.
But staying stuck in that place forever?
That only destroys the present.

Regret can become like a demon—clinging to your back, whispering in your ear, dragging you back to who you used to be. And if you’re not careful, it starts to feel like you are your mistakes. Like you’re undeserving of peace.

But here’s what I know now:

Regret is a signal.
Guilt is a signpost.
They were never meant to be permanent homes.

I can’t make up for everything I did.
I can’t force people to forgive me or erase their pain.
But I can choose to stop punishing myself.

I can choose grace.
I can choose compassion for the younger version of me who didn’t know better.
I can choose to take full responsibility—and still give myself permission to heal.

Because shame doesn’t make me better.
But forgiveness just might.

I forgive the version of me who didn’t know how to cope.
Who acted from fear.
Who carried unhealed wounds and let them spill out onto others.

I forgive my younger self—not because she did everything right, but because she was learning.
And learning is messy.
Growth is uncomfortable.
Healing is not linear.

But I’m here now.
I’m breathing again.
And I know I don’t have to carry the past on my back anymore.

If you’re holding onto regret—if you’re haunted by the person you used to be—please remember:
You are allowed to evolve.
You are allowed to let go.
You are allowed to be someone new.

And when you finally forgive yourself?
That’s when the real healing begins.

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